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Manchester
United's Worst ever games
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Villianous
American President Richard Nixon once said "Only when you have stood in
the darkest valley can you appreciate the view from the highest mountain".
You cannot appreciate the good without having experienced the bad and while
Manchester United have had a lot of trips to Silverware Mountain they've
also had numerous visits to Turd Valley as well. These are the sort of
games in which at full-time, you wonder why you put yourself through it all, you think about taking up new sports such as Chess or Water Polo, or even consider supporting Real Madrid instead. 3 seconds later though you wise up, you kick the cat, get insanely drunk and wake up the following day looking forward to next season.
Nevertheless, hideous defeats and gut wrenching disappointments are all part of being
a football fan. Even the greatest team in the world can't win them all.......
Here
is the McCleery's top 10 United stink-fests
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10
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FA Carling Premiership
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14th March
1998 Old Trafford
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| Manchester United 0 |
Arsenal 1 |
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Absolutely stinking, the
1997-98 League Championship campaign which had promised so much went down
the bog after this defeat. United never recovered and Arsenal went on to
win the title. It also affected the European Cup campaign, Peter Schmeichel
done his leg in, in the last minute going up for a corner and was forced
to miss the next game against Monaco - which saw United go out on away
goals. This also caused doubts, that without Eric Cantona, United wouldn't
win the title again and that Wenger's Arsenal would now begin the domination
of English football. Luckily such talk was all total bollocks.
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9
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League Division One
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19th April
1992 Anfield
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| Liverpool 2 |
Manchester United 0 |
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A physically shattered United
team came to Anfield needing a win to stop Leeds United from taking the
title. As Liverpool led 2-0 with minutes to go their fans sung "You'll
never win the League" and to be honest at that moment few could have argued
with them. Six League titles, three FA Cup's and one European Cup later,
the Scousers aren't singing now are they?
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8
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1976 FA Cup Final
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25th May
1976 Wembley Stadium
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| Manchester United 0 |
Southampton 1 |
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Losing to Southampton is
bad enough in a League match but to lose to them in a Cup Final is as painful
as having your arse burnt off. Not only that, but the crowning turd on
the pie is that lowly Southampton were in the old Second Division at the
time and that this victory is the only trophy they have ever bloody won.
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7
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1979 FA Cup Final
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12th May
1979 Wembley Stadium
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| Manchester United 2 |
Arsenal 3 |
| McILroy, McQueen |
Stapleton, Talbot, Sunderland |
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Undoubtedly a great game
for the so called "neutral fan" (whoever the hell they are?) but for United
this was totally gutting. Having been 2-0 down United brilliantly fought
back to draw level at 2-2 scoring twice with only 4 minutes to go. From
the restart, Arsenal kicked off and practically went straight up the pitch
and scored the bleeding winner through Alan "Giant perm" Sunderland. United
had barely time to break wind before the final whistle was blown. In all,
it was absolutely minging.
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6
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1995 FA Cup Final
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20th May
1995 Wembley Stadium
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| Manchester United 0 |
Everton 1 |
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Quite possibly the worst
FA Cup Final ever. United had no Cantona, Cole, Giggs, or Kanchelskis while
Everton reached new unheard of levels of boring direness. Even the winning
goal was a scrambled mess. This defeat meant United had lost their League
title one week, then the Cup the next. More stinking than a turd on toast
washed down with a barrel of monkey's piss.
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5
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Champions League Semi Final 2nd Leg
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23rd April
1997 Old Trafford
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| Manchester United 0 |
Borussia Dortmund 1 |
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Trailing 1-0 from the first
leg in Dortmund, United missed chance after chance while the lucky Germans
got a jammy early goal and sat back for 85 minutes defending like guards
at Colditz. Eric Cantona was so depressed by it all he retired soon after.
The Germans went on to win the cup beating Juventus 3-1 but I have to ask, where are Brussia
Dortmund now eh? Did they build on their sucess? Did they fuck!!!
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4
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League Division One
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24th April
1974 Old Trafford
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| Manchester United 0 |
Manchester City 1 |
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United were relegated to
the Second Division on this arse-ridden day by a freakish Denis Law back-heeled
goal that he meant as a joke. He was so emotionally scared at sending his
beloved old team down he retired the next day. United would have went down
anyway as they were reliant on other teams losing to keep them up, but
this result was still one huge rodent-sandwich.
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3
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European
Cup Quarter-Final 2000 2nd
Leg
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19th April
2000 Old Trafford
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| Manchester United 2 |
Real Madrid 3 |
| Beckham 64, Scholes 88 |
Keane 20 og, Raul 50,
52 |
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United fans and players
were left stunned by this exit by the eventual winners. We thought our
mighty Champions of Europe would sweep away Real and go on to retain the
big silver pot but it didn't work out that way. United conceded a disasterous
early own-goal from Roy Keane, then kamikaze attacking and expert
play on the counter-attack by the Spanish resulted at one point in an astonishing
3-0 lead for Real. United now needed 4 goals to go win and they did fight
back bravely to give the score respectability, however it was still one
big hamper of arse-sandwichs.
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2
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FA Carling Premiership
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8th May
2001 Old Trafford
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| Manchester United 0 |
Arsenal 1 |
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This takes some beating on the turd-o-meter. Of all the circumstances to lose the Premiership title and not any old title either, one we had held for three glorious seasons. The game was originally planned for April and only came about because of re-arranged FA Cup and European fixtures. Billed as the ultimate Premiership decider, Fergie needed a win or else Wenger would win the title at the Theatre of Dreams. A mortified Old Trafford watched on as United failed to threaten the Arsenal net once in 90 minutes. Eventually the life was taken out of the Reds by a crappy Arsenal counter-attack goal and Wenger declared "A shift in the balance of power" in English football to Highbury had occured. All United fans could do was wait through a long summer and hope Fergie could prove him wrong - and its still in the balance. This only escapes being the worst game of all time because at least Arsenal were a decent side and worthy champions, and don't forget, it could have been Liverpool......
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1
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FA Carling Premiership
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14th May
1995 Upton Park
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| West Ham United 1 |
Manchester United 1 |
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Imagine if Godzilla,King
Kong and the Rancor from Return of the Jedi got together and held a "Who
can fart the most Competition" in your back garden. The combined smell
from such an event would not match the stench of West Ham vs Manchester
United on the last day of the season 1995. United needed a win to take
the title over Blackburn who were playing Liverpool at Anfield. With Rovers
drawing (eventually losing 2-1) United would have won the title had they
found a winner after McClair's equaliser, but West Ham defended like their
lives depended on it, as United missed chance after chance. "An Obscene
amount of effort" Fergie called West Ham's performance. Still, as Kenny
Dalglish paraded the Premiership trophy around Anfield for Blackburn, United
fans can take pleasure from the fact that just 4 years later we would relegate
sad, rubbish Rovers back to to the (shitehole) First Division they came
from.
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