"They just come to me for a wee bit of Craic" says the United captain. He claims the first experience was in December 1998.

"It was Winter 1998 just after the game against Middlesbrough which we had lost 3-2. It was late that night, I remember going to my car in the Old Trafford car park. Suddenly a bright light hit me from above. At first I thought it was the floodlighting gone haywire, but no. I felt myself being lifted up in the air and I could see a silvery craft above me."

"I hoped at the time that it would turn out to be Giggsy and Butty playing a prank, but it is now clear that my experience was very real."

"When the beings got me on the ship, they seemed to try to put me at ease. They offered me some Guinness and a fry up. But I became nervous and uncomfortable - I was afraid at what kind of weird sexual experiments they were about to perform on me lad and that. Luckily I was wrong, they were big United fans and thought I was George Best!!!"

According to the fiery Irishman, their home planet, Zarg-a-far-grag-grag, recently started picking up intersteller transmissions. All Televison/ Radio broadcasts travel in space, but due to the vast distances between Earth and Zarg-a-far-grag-grag, the aliens had only recently picked up 1960's broadcasts featuring the great Busby team of Best, Law and Charlton.

After his first abduction, that season, Manchester United went on an unprecedented unbeaten run to clinch the Treble. Adds Keane "They must have had something to do with it, all those late goals and all".

After a second visit in 1999 says Keane: "It was them that encouraged me to attack the prawn sandwich eaters. The aliens told me that the corporate businessmen and tourists were sucking the life-force out of the team".

"Since then they have continually told me I was full of negative energy and that I should love my fellow man. At first I told them to feck-off but they said 'Roy you are too full of impetuous dark forces and should be more positive, think next time before you stick the boot in. Man is a sacred being, love each like a brother'. "I must admit it has helped me as I rarely get sent off much nowadays and my overall temperament has improved". Though, the tough man from Cork admits, "I still have a few wee scores to even yet, before I start any of that 'love' stuff".

As to the overall long term motive of the aliens, it is unclear. Keane missed the European Cup Final with suspension but says the strange beings have cryptically said to him "You will lift the European Cup, in the land of thistle and bagpipes......or maybe possibly the season after that".

Concluded the skipper: "I look forward to their next visit. I don't know if they've been abducting or talking to anyone else at Old Trafford, but who knows?"

The fans now will ask has perhaps Sir Alex himself has been visited? If Arsenal win the league, could extra-terrestrial advice be to blame? Why else then did he sell Jaap Stam and spend £28 million on Juan Sebastian Veron?

Taken From www.skysports.com